Went to Cousin John’s wake last night. Very low key. It was held at the funeral home. We recited only a decade of Hail Marys, and then talked about John. The priest was a school chum of John’s at Our Lady of Lourdes grammar school. The two of them had been good friends then, gone their separate ways for most of their lives, and in the past five years become reacquainted. A couple of John’s friends were there, but mostly it was a family affair. John was a quiet, shy, gentle and unassuming man. Hard to know how to express his absence. For many, he would not be missed because he was never noticed. John was a quiet presence at every family gathering. In a family that loved to talk and debate, and roar with laughter, John would often speak not a single word all evening. The press of crowds seemed painful for him. But he and I had many conversations. He was always interested in me, my family, and what was going on with us. He often wanted to share a tidbit of knowledge he had gained somewhere that he thought might be useful or interesting to me. He was a deep and soulful man. They say still waters run deep. That was John. The stillest of waters. What happened to him in the last days of his life was horrifying, and John was very brave to endure it.